
So you're back in school, settling in to a routine with classes, lunch table territory established, and relationship status? Boyfriend? Girlfriend? Homecoming dance is around the corner. Going alone?
"Back in the olden days" my parents had a rule. No dating the same boy more than twice without dating someone else in between. Yeah, right. From age sixteen I found "the one" at least every couple of months. I'd date "Mr. Right" the alloted two times, then my girlfriend's boyfriend would ask me out and once around the corner and out of sight, the switch would happen. We'd reconnect about five minutes to midnight curfew and switch back. Trouble with that, a couple of times, BFF's beau thought a kiss goodnight on the porch should happen "for appearance sake." Gross! Almost. Warning. Never, ever, kiss your BFF's boyfriend...more than once. Hard lesson. New "Mr. Right" eventually dumped me and I was left with no BFF or boyfriend, and one hurt "Mr. Wrong" who made the last month of my sophmore year sheer hell.
Midway through my junior year I found another "the one" and it lasted the rest of high school. Part of me regrets not playing the field, especially my senior year, not that my boyfried wasn't great, because he really was sweet and good, but because I felt like I missed out getting to know some other great boys. Exclusive relationships keep you isolated and having "friends" of the opposite sex isn't allowed, regardless of how harmless. After high school, we parted on friendly terms and I had a blast dating for two years before I really met "the one."
Life is short. I'd love to say don't get serious with just one person, and for a lot of reasons now that I've grown up, but I think this world has gotten so crazy that teens need security, and being in a monogamous relationship feels "safe." Problem is "safe" can lead to life altering consequences if "safe" isn't practiced. My "old" opinion.
Tell me. Is it easier to just have one boyfriend/girlfriend? Or do things get complicated? What about break-ups? Is there pressure to only be with one person? Would you advise someone to date only one person through high school, or tell them to get to know a lot of people before making any heavy commitments?
"Back in the olden days" my parents had a rule. No dating the same boy more than twice without dating someone else in between. Yeah, right. From age sixteen I found "the one" at least every couple of months. I'd date "Mr. Right" the alloted two times, then my girlfriend's boyfriend would ask me out and once around the corner and out of sight, the switch would happen. We'd reconnect about five minutes to midnight curfew and switch back. Trouble with that, a couple of times, BFF's beau thought a kiss goodnight on the porch should happen "for appearance sake." Gross! Almost. Warning. Never, ever, kiss your BFF's boyfriend...more than once. Hard lesson. New "Mr. Right" eventually dumped me and I was left with no BFF or boyfriend, and one hurt "Mr. Wrong" who made the last month of my sophmore year sheer hell.
Midway through my junior year I found another "the one" and it lasted the rest of high school. Part of me regrets not playing the field, especially my senior year, not that my boyfried wasn't great, because he really was sweet and good, but because I felt like I missed out getting to know some other great boys. Exclusive relationships keep you isolated and having "friends" of the opposite sex isn't allowed, regardless of how harmless. After high school, we parted on friendly terms and I had a blast dating for two years before I really met "the one."
Life is short. I'd love to say don't get serious with just one person, and for a lot of reasons now that I've grown up, but I think this world has gotten so crazy that teens need security, and being in a monogamous relationship feels "safe." Problem is "safe" can lead to life altering consequences if "safe" isn't practiced. My "old" opinion.
Tell me. Is it easier to just have one boyfriend/girlfriend? Or do things get complicated? What about break-ups? Is there pressure to only be with one person? Would you advise someone to date only one person through high school, or tell them to get to know a lot of people before making any heavy commitments?